Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Like math, writing a good intro is hard.
- Trying to find a good wall calendar sucks. I spent about two hours browsing online until I finally found one good enough to grace my wall for an entire year.
- Have a zit under my right nostril, but, like… on the skin between where my face and nostril meet? It’s horrible and it hurts like a bitch.
- I still desperately need a haircut. Hoping to find time this week because this shit really, really needs to be tamed.
- I hate it when my touch-pad goes all retarded on me.
- I know that New Year’s is just a few days away, but I’m kind of tired of all of these Best/Worst of 2010 lists that are popping up everywhere.
- I watched The Time Traveler’s Wife recently and the end result was me crying like a bitch.
- I watched Scott Pilgrim vs. The World recently and the end result was me not crying like a bitch.
teaser-trailer.comNo tears formula
- I’ve placed a ban on stuffed animals. My daughters have so many that it is absolutely ridiculous – it has to be well over forty or fifty -- after donating a shit-ton of them to various charities.
- The girls got Moon Dough for Christmas, and while the idea is cool, the execution sucks. The stuff flakes and turns into powder, so it gets all over anything in the vicinity (particularly fabric) and requires massive clean up.
- I have banned that shit until further notice.
- My deodorant is totally failing me right now. I find this greatly distressing.
So, this is it – the final RTT of the year. I don’t have any New Year’s resolutions but I am hoping that in 2011, I will be able to sleep through the night ccompletely uninterrupted at least once. That would be AMAZING, but would require Munchkin to stop being so neurotic for a two year old, and for my stupid cat to stop hurpa durrping at five in the morning. Wish me luck.
Monday, December 27, 2010
I don’t suppose many people spend Christmas searching their local sex offender registry and getting worked up into a murderous rage, but that’s precisely what I ended up doing this past Saturday. Don’t get me wrong – the morning was filled with much joy as the girls opened gift after gift and squealed in delight at the things that Santa brought them. There was the usual post-gift-exchange clean-up (you know, the one that seems to span infinite time and space because there’s so much paper and cardboard everywhere?) and phone calls to and from relatives to exchange best wishes and all that jazz. However, a run of the mill trip to the mailbox turned into something entirely unexpected because The Fates decided to piss in my cornflakes. Big time.
wikipedia.orgNow with 50% more piss!
After the kids went to bed and things settled down, I ended up using my county’s sex offender registry to find out more about the creeper on the flyer but instead, I found a bigger reason to flip out. There are two other guys -- both Level 2 offenders -- living within the area. When I Googled WA state's criteria for how they classify these fucks, this is what I got:
Level 2 offenders have a moderate risk of re-offending. They generally have more than one victim and the abuse may be long term. These offenders usually groom their victims and may use threats to commit their crimes. These crimes may be predatory with the offender using a position of trust to commit their crimes. Typically these individuals do not appreciate the damage they have done to their victims.
Level 3 offenders are considered to have a high risk to re-offend. They usually have one or more victims and may have committed prior crimes of violence. They may not know their victim(s). The crime may show a manifest cruelty to the victim(s) and these offenders usually deny or minimize the crime. These offenders commonly have clear indications of a personality disorder.
Reading through the profiles of each of the men made my skin crawl; Level 2 raped a drugged victim – a fourteen year old girl whose family considered him a close friend. Further read-through of the dossier revealed that prior to this, he was convicted in Cali for attempted rape of a drugged victim (so he came to WA and succeeded!?! GAH!!) and unlawful intercourse with a minor. Level 2 No.2 decided to touch a couple of his family members in places that should never be touched by any relative ever. Mister My-Face-Showed-Up-In-Your-Mailbox (Level 3) has molested several girls ranging in age from 5 – 15.
roflposters.comNo explanation needed.
When Jeremy and I watched Kick-Ass for the first time, we marveled at Hit Girl.(Ooh, tangent!) The trailers and telly spots made her look incredibly annoying, but in the actual movie, she was a total badass, dismembering groups of grown men with assorted firearms and sharp, pointy things. At one point, we looked at each other and I don’t know who spoke first, but the conversation was short (and completely serious):
“We need to teach the girls how to do that.”
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Who caught the lunar eclipse last night? I got to see a little of it but it was too damn cold out to be standing in my driveway past midnight! Pretty cool though, right? (The eclipse, not my low tolerance for the cold.) Anyway, it’s Tuesday so that means it's time for (drum roll, please)…
- Oh, shit. Christmas is on Saturday, isn’t it. (Fuuuuuck…)
- I haven’t finished my Christmas cards yet. (Fuuuuuck…)
- You know that guy who wrote that book about pedophilia? I’m glad he was arrested and I hope he dies. Painfully. I am completely serious.
- The new Lonely Island single is out!! Have you seen the video or heard the song? It will change your life!
|Society has clearly started advancing.|
- I’m surprised that Munchkin is still alive. Why? Because the damn kid doesn’t eat. Midget hit this phase, too, but Midget was never a garbage disposal.
- My mum sent me an old lady cardigan from Victoria’s Secret. It smells of plastic and is definitely the frumpiest piece of clothing I own.
- When my mum told me that the package was from Victoria’s Secret, I felt the need to remind her of that time that I quit my job at VS after sitting through the six-hour training seminar.
- Goddamn, this sweater really smells of plastic.
- Midget and Munchkin have proclaimed that they like “Telephone” by Lady Gaga and Beyonce.
- The girls also like “I’m On A Boat,” by The Lonely Island and will start singing it when it comes on in the car. However, since they are obviously not allowed to use “grown-up words,” they really can’t (and don’t) sing along past the one-minute mark.
- Does anybody know who this creepy bitch co-hosting Attack of the Show is?! She’s like, this skinny little goth woman with a GIANT head and deep red lipstick. She’s gross.
- I could probably Google that last one, but I don’t really feel like it.
- I am seriously considering changing my Facebook profile pic to Strutting Leo. (Know your meme, folks!)
knowyourmeme.comHaters gonna hate.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Can I blame my lack of meaningful blog posts on Santa Buddies? Because I just saw a thirty-second television spot for its premier and I swear at least half of my brain cells just died. All I could do was stare in slack-jawed horror at the bizarre images on my “tee-bee,” as Munchkin so enthusiastically calls it. I think the real horror is that puppies will always appeal to children, so Midget, who was actually asking me questions about that movie during a shopping trip earlier this week, is going to be ALL OVER that shit.
©Walt Disney PicturesGoddammit.
I’m black-listing Santa Buddies. Or Paws. Or whatever the shit it’s called. I have a short list of blacklisted movies and television shows; I think that letting my kids watch something that’s incredibly stupid could be way more damaging than letting them watch a five-minute Mickey Mouse short. Now, I know that they are kids, and these are just movies, and they are family-friendly, and blah, blah, blah, but some of these movies are just so damn ridiculous that I can’t help but be like, “No.”
©Warner Bros. PicturesFAIL.
Also worth mentioning about 80’s family and children’s movies is that there was nothing like Beverly Hills Chihuahua or that Shark Boy and Lava Girl bullshit. It makes me wonder when and why the standard for what’s appropriate for kids to see changed – and why.
I’m not really sure of where I’m going with this, to be honest. In fact, this whole post was largely the result of a breakdancing dog, so take from that what you will…
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
It’s kind of late, and today has sort of sucked, but it’s still Tuesday, which means that I can still squeeze in my weekly stream-of-consciousness fuckery and feel glad that I managed to post something.
- At around one this morning I was awoken by a CRAZY wind storm. It sounded like the Cloverfield monster was outside of my house screaming and shaking it. Yes – the wind was shaking the entire goddamn house and knocked the power out for about two seconds.
- Midget has been sick for a few days and I am desperately trying to get her better by tomorrow so that she can sing in her school’s holiday program. However, the kid does not believe in rest, even when she is running a temperature and looks like she is dying.
- On the subject of Midget, no headless dolls this week! W00t!
- Washington drivers are seriously some of the worst I have ever seen. It’s amazing how many people don’t use their signals, cut you off, tailgate, and go under the speed limit. I fucking hate these people.
- There is seriously nothing on telly right now. I have a bazillion channels and I can never find anything that I want to watch. WTF, Comcast?
- IGN.com did their Game of the Year awards, and I seriously don’t understand how or why Heavy Rain was nominated for and won Best Horror Game because it is not a horror game by any stretch of the imagination.
- Just discovered Zuma Blitz on Facebook. Holy hell, I now have a new time-suck.
- I have yet to mail out my Christmas cards. Megan only got hers because I included it in a package I sent her way. All of the other cards are sitting on my counter. Blank.
You know what else is blank? The inside of my head at the moment. Today has been so aggravating that I’m totally fried. Ugh. It might be time for me to run upstairs and police the living shit out of bedtime, as I am hearing way too much noise coming from the baby monitor (which I hate with a passion, btw. That’s a story/rant for another day…).
You know what, though? I’m going to take this RTT out on a much more positive note by including a shout out to a certain homie of mine who is having a baby tomorrow!!! Congratulations, dude!! :D
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
|(Don't forget to visit Keely, the originator of RTT!)|
- I FINALLY saw Deathly Hallows and it was fucking AWESOME!!
- Munchkin has hit that really aggravating part of the Terrible Two’s where everything we tell her is met with a curt, “No.” Totally not my idea of a good time.
- Root beer is gross.
- I will never understand why young children are obsessed with standing on their heads.
- Midget took her Princess Jasmine doll to school yesterday. When I picked her up in the afternoon, Jasmine was newly headless, her plastic neck made of jagged edges.
- I am not entirely convinced that Midget “twisted it too much.” Twisting does not usually snap hard plastic.
- Dunham Smash?
- No 90210 until the end of January! What the fuck, CW?? And what the shit with the ending to last night’s episode? It concludes on an intensely sinister note, but then the preview for the next episode is all cheery and happy and campy.
- I started Alan Wake months ago now, and I am only on the second chapter. I need to buckle down and finish it.
alanwake.comLack of progress makes Alan sad.
- I still have yet to resolve this whole phantosmia issue.
- I donated all of my Dickies pants to charity today. As much as I loved those pants, I will never be able to fit into them again. Thank you, post childbirth hips!! (This is blatant sarcasm.)
Sunday, December 5, 2010
My kids are fucking weird, and I say that in the most loving possible way. I’m pretty sure that Jeremy and I have a lot to do with this: through the miracle that is
a night with movies and beer procreation, our individual eccentricities have joined together to create the goddamn Devastator of weirdness, which can now be found in our kids’ DNA (presumably somewhere between eye colour and body-type).
|I reckon it's somewhere to the left?|
For the last couple of years, since Midget started talking, I have posted some of her more memorable bits on Facebook for my friends and family to see. So, since I’m kind of hurting for actual shit to write about, I’ve decided to share some of these bits here on the blog, so that anybody reading this can enjoy some of the oddities that come out of my kid's mouth. The two-year old is still a n00b when it comes to this speaking thing, so I don’t have any good quotes from her… yet.
Actual Snippet of Conversation #1
Me: Midget, what is your problem?!
Midget: I don't KNOW! ... maybe I should sleep.
*grabs my face under my left eye and pinches*
Midget: You with the cheeky cheeky.
*gives me an eskimo kiss and then smiles and caresses (yes, caresses) my face*
Midget: I'm so sorry. I just mean that.
Actual Snippet of Conversation #2
Midget: Gizmo is going to take me to go see a movie.
Me: He is?
Midget: Yeah. He's going to take me to see a movie called "Hemelations."
Me: "Hemelations?" O_o
Midget: Yup. Bye mom! I'm going to see Hemelations now. Come on, Gizmo. You're taking me. ...Yup; you sure are!
|This fuckin' guy.|
Actual Snippet of Conversation #3
Midget: Mommy, when I get older you will buy me a swore.
Me: A what?
Midget: A suh-worr.
Midget: A Suh-WORRR!
Me: *light bulb over head clicks on* A sword??
Midget: Yeah, a sword. When I get older you will buy me one.
Me: Absolutely not.
Me: I don't even have a sword. Why on earth would you want one?
Midget: So I can stab people if they touch my nipples.
Actual Snippet of Conversation #4
(This is the most recent one, taking place a few weeks ago.)
Midget: Mommy, do I know everything?
Me: Nope. Not even close.
Midget: Does Daddy know everything?
Me: Nope. Nobody knows everything.
Midget: ...Yes he does.
It goes without saying that my husband is particularly fond of that last one.
I can’t even begin to imagine the type of shit Munchkin is going to start coming up with.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
- I STILL haven’t seen Deathly Hallows.
- The term “jeggings” makes me almost unreasonably angry.
- I told Jeremy to get me Marvel vs. Capcom 3 as my Valentine’s gift. Nothing says “I love you” quite like stringing together crazy 30+ hit combos and farming Achievements.
- Fun fact: the first game Jeremy and I ever played together was the first Marvel vs. Capcom. (And I beat his ass with my "sissy-pink Chun-Li counterpart!")
- Portal 2 was originally supposed to be out in February as well. Sadly, Valve pushed it back to an April release. This makes me a sad panda.
©ValveVital testing apparatus destroyed.
- Had another dream about the zombie apocalypse last week. In this one I was infected, and really, really pissed off about it.
- My hair went from “Pretty Decent” to “Cousin It” seemingly out of nowhere.
- I found an awesome picture of Dave Chappelle as Prince that I am inserting here for your viewing pleasure, as well as mine.
- I was supposed to get a tattoo in July. It’s almost December. What the fuck?
- For days now, I have been smelling cigarette smoke for no apparent reason. I don’t smoke. No one around me smokes. I’ll be minding my own business and then, BAM – my nasal passages start hallucinating. Always happens around the same time and while I’m in the same place – in my goddamn living room. It’s getting really annoying.
- I have slathered the tip of my nose with deodorant more than a few times in an effort to get the above described phantom smell to stop. This is either really clever, or really sad. Probably the latter because the smell is a reoccurring phenomenon.
- Dexter fans who are current on Season 5: Did shit get real or did shit get real?! The weekly wait between episodes is almost painful...
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Awww, shit! Get your towels ready, it’s … wait a minute. It’s not about to go down – I just have "I’m On A Boat" stuck in my head (as usual). With that said, it’s time for a new installment of Random Tuesday Thoughts! Weeee!
- I’m finally supposed to see Deathly Hallows tonight. We’ll see what happens though – I was supposed to see it last night, but it started snowing, and my all-weather tires decided that they weren’t all-weather enough for snowy weather. Driving around with almost no traction whatsoever just to see Harry Potter is… well, honestly, I totally would have done it if my husband hadn’t stepped in as the voice of reason, as he is prone to doing.
- On the subject of my husband, I had not truly lived until I saw him randomly tour jeté into our goddamn living room over the weekend. He did it to get a laugh out of the girls but I’m pretty sure that I enjoyed it much more than they did.
- There’s a line at the end of Beauty and the Beast that has always bothered the shit out of me. It’s right after the Beast transforms back to his human self. Do you know what I’m talking about here? He looks at Belle and says, “It’s ME!” to which she replies (after playing with his hair a little bit before looking into his eyes) “It IS you!” Really, Belle? Even though you just saw him change back to his human self it took a quick glance at his baby blues to confirm that the guy in front of you, who happens to be wearing the exact same clothes as the Beast you just cried over, is in fact the Beast you just cried over? I thought they said Belle was SMART.
- The song "This is Hardcore" by Pulp is seriously one of the most awesome songs in history. It’s also one of the dirtiest. Seriously, listen to thoses lyrics, man! Or Google them, whatever. Either way, the song itself is the shit.
- I haven’t uploaded any new art to my deviantART account since August. Before that, it was May. Sometimes I wonder why I even bother to renew my membership every year.
- I walked by a magazine that had a photo of Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart, with a big bold headline that said something about them getting married. Good for them and all, but I have to be honest: they look like the most boring couple on the planet; like their idea of a good time is renting a Rug Doctor.
- Munchkin’s vocabulary has exploded over the last few weeks, and it’s pretty awesome. Seriously, the day after her birthday she started stringing together two and three word sentences with ease. I love that we can all somewhat understand her now, because that pointing and grunting thing was getting old.
- Midget is having some sort of holiday program at her pre-school, so she has been practicing assorted holiday songs with her schoolmates for the last couple of weeks. There’s something insanely cute about her off-key rendition of "I Want A Hippopotamus For Christmas." I can’t wait to see the actual performance.
- I took Gizmo for his annual check-up over the weekend because I’ve been really slack on that shit. So slack, that, like… he was due for his distemper vaccine some time last year. Oddly enough, I was told by this new vet that Gizmo should lose two pounds. The cat is a fucking beanpole. He is also part Maine Coon (the largest domestic breed of cat) so he’s supposed to be LARGE.
- FUCK the newly greenlit Buffy reboot! No Whedon, no Buffy. Period.
- Magic… muthafucka! (Ten points to anyone who knows what I’m even talking about here.)
- I found a plethora of left over blue hair dye under my sink last week. It made me miss my dye jobs. Maybe I’ll channel some Illyria (Wut up, Angel fans?!) up in this bitch and streak it… just so that the dye doesn’t go to waste.
- Blogger is fucking up my shit -- big time. It's always changing my goddamn font and giving me other formatting issues. Getting pretty pissed here.
- I seriously refuse to put the goddamn cat on a diet.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
So, there’s this blogger called Keely, AKA the Un-Mom, and she has this thing – Random Tuesday Thoughts. I’m going to give it a go, because it’s Tuesday, and there’s a lot of random shit swimming around in my head at the moment. So... let's do this:
- I read an article in Game Informer magazine last week about the thirty most influential videogame characters of the last decade. It was retarded. Influential in what way? Were these numbers picked at random or are they actual ranks? Because if they are ranks, GLaDOS has no business in the number one spot. Don't get me wrong; I love me some Portal, and GLaDOS is awesome, but come on. There were also numerous omissions (Marcus Fenix, where art thou?), and, well, the whole thing was just very poorly put together. It was lame.
- My front lawn is absolutely out of control. Every time myself or my husband resolve to mow the damn thing, it rains. And rains. And rains. It rains so much that even when it’s not raining, the ground is still soaked through. We seriously have the worst grass on the block. I have no idea how everyone else around here gets their lawns to look perfect. They must all have pacts with the devil or something.
- Speaking of neighbors, I saw Pajama Guy the other day. Wearing the same stupid pajama pants. They are dreadful.
- Interacting with moms that I don’t know is terrifying. This was reinforced when I went to the birthday party of a good friend’s daughter last weekend. The moms with the babies strapped to them seemed especially frightening. I totally lucked out when I met that Selby Chick!
- Munchkin’s sleep schedule has gone completely ape-shit, and it’s driving me nuts. She actually woke up at three a.m. a couple of times. Fucking three a.m. No clue why this is happening, but it better stop soon. Or else I’ll just get grumpier than I already am.
- And, finally, if I have to wait until the blu-ray release to see Deathly Hallows Pt.1 I will punch somebody in the face. Seriously. Not joking here.
movieposterdb.comAbsolutely CANNOT miss this!!
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
I wouldn’t classify myself as a nosy person. When talking to my friends I wait for them to tell me things -- I don't prod for details unless it's something huge. I keep to myself and rarely interact with my neighbors. Maybe it's because sometimes I wonder if anybody around here is stashing hookers in their crawl spaces, because places that appear to be perfect rarely are, but I digress.
Anyway, now that we’ve established how not nosy I am, let’s talk about tonight. I was sorting this crazy mountain of laundry that had accumulated in the upstairs foyer over the last two weeks and came across some clothes that Munchkin had grown out of. I went to place said clothes into the “Charity or Care Package?” basket in our future library/office, which is a total train wreck of a room right now, and noticed an ass-ton of coloured lights streaming in through the currently bare windows. (No window treatments yet...) So, I walk over to the basket as planned but can’t help but notice two EMS trucks directly across the street from my house. I left the room and stupidly asked my husband, who was cooking dinner at the time, if he knew that the trucks were there. Of course he didn’t know – he was in the goddamn kitchen!
Back to the sorting I went, taking clothes from room to room, closet to closet. Folding pants, matching socks, throwing away fabric softener sheets… and then I HAD to see what was going on outside! I finished with the clothing and turned off every light upstairs so that I could creep back into the office like a fucking ninja. I crouched on the floor under the window and peered out, waiting to get some kind of visual clue as to what the hell happened.
I felt like the biggest asshole in the world.
Here I was, crouched under my own window, in the dark, watching the EMTs carry the old man I see almost daily down the stairs and onto a stretcher, all the while hoping that nobody would notice my giant bottom of a bottle glasses peering over the windowsill. I suppose that anyone would wonder what the hell was happening if they suddenly saw emergency vehicles and personnel swarming the house across their street, but still. Watching from afar in a darkened room seemed somehow… excessive, if not just plain wrong. Yet there I was, as bad as those idiot rubber-neckers who hold up traffic trying to get a glimpse of an accident on the other side of the road, hoping that the streetlamp outside wouldn’t give away my position.
And then, it happened.
Enter stage left: some random bloke in a white t-shirt and pajama pants waltzing over to the house, trying to look as casual as possible. In the dark. In his motherfucking pajamas.
I watched as he walked right up to the EMTs as they loaded the old man onto the stretcher. This guy was so obviously looking for a tasty chunk of
gossip information that it was kind of gross, really. I watched as he momentarily disappeared from sight (he walked behind one of the trucks) and then promptly reappeared, shot down and walking back toward his perfect -- possibly hooker-hiding -- house. Watching this asshole made me feel worlds better about myself, as my curiosity was hidden in a dark room as opposed to right up in some shit that, quite frankly, no one but the parties involved had any right to be up in.
I can only hope that the EMT he briefly spoke with – or even my incapacitated neighbor himself – told Pajama Guy to fuck off.
Thursday, October 28, 2010
Okay, so, clearly, things here look waaay different than the last time you visited, right? I decided to go ahead and update my template, but with new templates come all sorts of headaches: reconfiguring widgets, tweaking code, making sure links within said code are working, etc. etc. Of course, I am a lazy bastard and I am prone to getting distracted by things like my kids not going to bed, or my husband groping me, or whatever's on telly (if it's interesting), so some stuff may not work right away. Just know that I know, and that I'm working on it (sort of) and, eventually, this space will be fully functional and just might resemble a REAL web page.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
See, the thing about Nagi’s death is that it was untimely; even though he was classified as “geriatric” he was still pretty young when he passed – he had only turned eight a few months prior. Unfortunately, he had a giant tumor growing behind his sternum that nobody knew about until our veterinarian was kind enough to perform a necropsy for me (and even he was blown away by his findings; the tumor was roughly the size of an adult male fist). Said tumor ruptured and bled out one night, causing the cat to scream before literally dropping dead just outside of my bedroom. (Can I just say that the sound of death is absolutely terrifying? Because it is.)
|It really didn't get much better than this.|
Gizmo is very dear to me, but the sad truth is that I can’t look at him without thinking about how great Nagi was, and how very much I still miss that son of a bitch.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
It's been a long, long time since I have been awarded anything other than a poopy diaper or sleep deprivation, so imagine my surprise when the fabulous Sam over at Rot du Jour sent this, the One Lovely Blog Award, my way!
I seriously never thought that the word "lovely" would ever be associated with the internet space for my acerbic and nonsensical ramblings. Also, I never thought that more than three or four people NOT related to me would ever read this shit to begin with! This totally qualifies as double rainbow, right??
Monday, October 4, 2010
- You can totally commit vehicular homicide and get away with it! The worst that will happen to you? Three months house-arrest and seven to eight years on probation! For KILLING someone -- and driving drunk! So go run some fuckers down; it'll be rad!
|I'm a killer! w00t w00t|
- It’s okay to steal from the dead. Especially if the dead was a singer/songwriter. Take their shit, claim it as your own, and everybody will love you. (Though it does look like Adrianna is going to face the consequences for this... maybe. We'll see.)
- Planting cocaine in a schoolmate’s locker is perfectly acceptable.
- Get drunk in public. Especially if you are underage. It’s awesome since nobody ever asks for ID.
- Running from the cops is super fun, especially since they are too incompetent to actually catch you!
- Do not trust anyone with an accent, particularly if said accent is English.
|See these blokes? EVIL. (Especially lefty.)|
- Every relationship in the universe is doomed. Doomed, goddammit!!
Monday, September 27, 2010
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
I have a confession to make: I’m a chick and I am a gamer.
digitallydownloaded.netThis was all we had, son!
|Heart this guy!|
|Estuans interius ira vehementi... |
|Mickey Mouse from Kingdom Hearts 2. See all those zippers and buckles??|
|A. Single. Button.|
creativeuncut.comCase in point: this chap is called Snow.
Monday, September 6, 2010
|So. Goddamn. Pretty!!! (No sunlight needed.)|
So, the vampires in the Twilight Universe don’t burn up when the sun hits them, they don’t have fangs, they do not sleep during the day (in fact, they don’t sleep at all), and they are venomous. (That’s right – if a Twilight vamp wishes to sire somebody, all they have to do is bite them a few times and wait until the venom slowly transforms them into a “vamp”.) With that being said, I’m thinking that the term “un-vampire” might be a more accurate descriptor for the Cullens and their glittery brethren.
|Cold, metallic EVE is more human than Bella.|
25hourbooks.comThink before you ink.
|Vampire teeth were made for tearing shit up.|
|Well said, dude.|