Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #54 -- Christmas, coffee, and a cat video!

The year is coming to an end, so I figured why not get in on this one last time before 2012?

Like a boss.

  • Christmas was chaos! Pure, unbridled chaos! I’m so glad that it’s over – what about you guys?
  • The girls got HELLA stuff! HELLA stuff. Stuff that took eons to open because of the absolutely insane amount of plastic, cardboard, and twine that I spent Christmas morning cutting through. Stuff that is already scattered all over the damn house. Needless to say, they are quite happy.
  • Jeremy got me my own frappucino maker, meaning that I will be overly caffeinated FOREVER. Ooh! And it comes with recipes for alcoholic coffee drinks, which probably shouldn’t be allowed to exist, but, clearly, they do! Alcohol + caffeine high… I’ll let you know how that works out.
  • On the subject of caffeine highs: A few days ago Alice Bradley, AKA Finslippy, posted some amazing gems to the “Twitterverse”:

  • I’ve been playing a very slow game of catch-up with American Horror Story. That show, is fucking weird. Oh, and Tate? OMGWTFBBQSCREAM!!! I might do a more thorough, albeit spoiler-heavy post in regards to that chap another time, because, well… why not?
I can never watch Kick-Ass the same way again.

Fuck, I’ve totally run out of steam for this! Probably because the kids are still wide awake (we are dealing with some massive sleep issues again…) and because Jeremy and I are supposed to watch some more AHS this evening. However, I shall leave you with what is absolutely the best cat video on the internet. This shit is still funny even after several viewings.

See you next year~!!

Wednesday, December 21, 2011

I'm more upset about this than I should be

Update: Due to massive formatting issues with Blogger (as well as my own goddamn stupidity) a couple of images didn't show up in the earlier versions of this post. Goddamn, I hope hitting "preview" and "publish" will stop giving me different results...

So. Iconic character; same face/look (wardrobe changes notwithstanding) for roughly ten years. Out of nowhere she's given a  new, outright bizarre face with no explanation other than some bullshit about "keeping the character fresh." It's like suddenly giving Mario six-pack abs, or modeling Link after Christian Bale -- to keep them fresh, of course!

Before; Resident Evil Remake

Before; Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles

Resident Evil 5; note the bitchin' ball cap and newer tech.

After; Resident Evil: Revelations

After; Resident Evil: Revelations

After; Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City
(looks more human than Rev; will chalk that up to Slant Six)

What's up, botox? What's up nose-job? Do the character designers think that this new, plastic look is more visually appealing to gamers? I don't think I would mind so much if this was an all new character, but it's not, so... yeah. 

At least there are other people out there who feel the same way, so that makes me feel a little less like a crazy fan-girl bitch. There are even petitions and Facebook pages about it, but with only a couple of hundred people getting in on it (despite even some Twitter efforts of her original face model), nothing will change. 

As much as it pains me to say (type) it, I think the newly botoxed, straight busted Jill is here to stay.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #53 -- At the risk of sounding like a couch potato...

After a bit of a hiatus, I actually have enough ammo for…

Still hosting RTT like a boss!

  • The mid-season ender of The Walking Dead seriously wrecked my shit for a good thirty-six hours or so. The last five minutes was one of those scenes that just… sticks.
  • I’ve been potty-training Munchkin with some pretty good results. I hope I didn’t just jinx it by typing that. Now, if I can get her to start pooping… and wean her off of the treats she’s currently being bribed with.
  • I had a Deathly Hallows double-feature a few nights ago: obviously both movies back to back. Part II’s Battle For Hogwarts was so much more epic and amazing in my head, but whatever. I must say that being fully awake while watching the Courtyard Apocalypse sequence made a big difference in how it affected me, though. The shot of Lavender is chilling.
  • Snape’s memories still completely wrecked my shit. “Always.” Goddamn you, Snape!
After all this time...
  • Midget put on one of my old bras and strutted into the kitchen like she was the cat’s meow. I would be lying if I said it wasn’t at all creepy.
  • Dexter and Homeland combo on Sunday nights = awesome night for telly.
  • The entirely of Boardwalk Empire is sitting on my DVR, neglected and unwatched.
  • Congratulations to Miguel Cotto for beating up Antonio Margarito over the weekend! For all you non-boxing savvy readers, the pair fought three years ago, Cotto getting the living shit beaten out of him. In Margarito’s very next bout, they discovered that he was attempting to go into the fight with plaster-loaded wraps on his hands. Obviously, the question was raised as to whether or not his gloves were loaded against Cotto. Judging by how Saturday’s fight went, they were.
  • Sushi.
  • "Baby, I'm no Fred Flinstone, but I'll make your bed rock!" Whyyyy do things like this exist?!
  • I can't handle cold weather. It's tragic because it is fucking cold up in this piece, and I may actually have to invest in some thermal underwear.
  • Writer’s block can suck on my nuts.
Aaand, with that last though, I’m out!

Thursday, November 17, 2011

My mom gave Midget a bible and it's totally fucking with my shit

Religion is always one of those topics that makes me groan and roll my eyes. See, I was raised Catholic – kind of. I only went to church a handful of times, and I think I missed a communion or two. I chalk it up to my family being busy and dysfunctional. Anyway, my household wasn’t like, super religious or anything, but there was talk of God, and there were rosaries, and crosses and bibles. Hell, I even wore a little golden crucifix around my neck until I turned about thirteen or so and decided that it just wasn’t for me.

Flash forward to maaaany years later: I got into Wicca, but I didn’t practice strictly or anything like that. In fact, as time goes on, I have found myself rather disconnected from a good deal of it. I describe myself as “Pagan with a dash of ‘Why bother’?” because I look around at the world and all of the truly horrible things that go on, and I sincerely have trouble believing in much of anything other than the fact that people are pretty fucked up.

When it comes to the kids, it’s a challenge, especially since nobody in the family shares my “faith” (if it can even be called that). Thankfully, they aren’t against it, either. (Not entirely, anyway, but wait, okay?) Anyway, teaching the girls will definitely be rather tricky: I want them to be able to be exposed to different religions so that they can choose what’s right for them – if anything, that is – but finding a way to go about that hasn’t been easy, and it sure as hell hasn’t been at the top of my To-Do List.

And that’s when my mom stepped on my toes by giving Midget a copy of The Bible and talking about God.

Without my permission.

Without Jeremy’s permission.

Without even mentioning it to either of us before doing it.

She told me about it after the fact and even gave me my own Bible to, IDK, mull over? Maybe she’s hoping to sway me back to the proverbial light? Because she was extremely vocal about disagreeing with my particular brand of spirituality: She shouted that it was “Devil shit,” and “evil,” and the like. (On the flip side, my dad was oddly supportive; he’ll even makes good-natured jokes about crystal balls and patchouli – it’s awesome.)

So, now, Midget has a Bible that I have tried to keep away until at least a little later (because we all know how frustrating it can be to explain anything remotely complex to small children) but she keeps finding the fucking thing and asking questions that I don’t feel that I can even begin to explain at this point in her life.

Goddamn it.

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #52: Umm, yeah.

Bahahahaha! I made it to this week’s installment of…


  • When I heard that Hollywood was making a film adaptation of 21 Jump Street I groaned and said, “Whyyyyy?” Then, I caught the red band trailer for it a few days ago and now I actually want to see it.
  • I heard the new single from Chevelle on the radio and was terribly disappointed. What the fuck, Chevelle?
  • Everyone’s been sick again, signaling the usual Seattle brand of wintery despair… before winter, of course. Runny noses and Man Colds need to get the hell out of my house already.
  • So, when Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 was announced a couple of months ago, I called bullshit so hard, but now that I’ve seen the reveal trailer for Dead Rising’s Frank West, I think it just might be worth picking up. Of course, Chuck Greene (from Dead Rising 2) is an infinitely better character, but whatever. West has some pretty cool shit going on.
Zombies and weapons and cameras -- oh, my!

  • UMvC3: I have to wonder why my head bitch, Jill Valentine, is still DLC?! Capcom fucking mystifies me. (At least that shit transfers over; a lot of people – myself included – would be bloody pissed if they had to pay for her and Shuma Gorath all over again.)
  • Okay, last MvC3 related thought for the day: Watching combo videos depresses the hell out of me. I mentioned it awhile back, how my old, damaged hands just can’t keep up with some of the more complex controller inputs? Yeah. Thanks, PHS.
  • Still have yet to finish Alan Wake. Think I’ll do it by the end of the year? (Me neither.)
  • I almost broke my nose a couple of weeks ago when a tackle-hug for Midget went horribly wrong. I bring this up because even though it’s way better than it was, it still hurts. A lot. Also, I reckon my glasses are now slightly crooked from the incident.
  • Costco pumpkin pie is surprisingly tasty. And massive. And massively tasty.
  • I caught the first episode of American Horror Story a few days ago (On Demand = love) and I am really intrigued by it. I didn't find it scary at all... just, weird. Is it supposed to be scary?
I had absolutely no intention of so much shit spilling out this week; I suppose I'm making up for the last few lethargic posts. IDK. Whatever. So, there you have it. I've hit fifty-two, so now that I've accomplished that goal, I may or may not take a break next week.

Until next time~

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #51: Help me, I am still in laundry hell

Ho hum, you guys. Ho. Hum.


  • So, what can I say about Halloween today…? I’ve mentioned a million times that it’s Munchkin’s birthday, so I’ll start with that. We threw a party for her on Sunday so that folks could make it over, and I am bloody exhausted. So much cleaning and planning and decorating went into it. All in all the birthday and the holiday were successful: the birthday girl was/is happy, no one got killed and we have an absolutely ridiculous amount of candy in the house.
  • Okay, so there was one Halloween fail, and that was my costume. I was going to be an undead police officer (I think I linked a pic a few weeks back?). I had a shit-ton of fake blood, a bomb-ass prosthetic bite wound, and all kind of cool shit to really make the costume… pop (LOLZ forever because I crack myself up sometimes). Unfortunately, do to time constraints, the only bit of makeup I was able to apply was around my eyes; the bite and my skillz with powders and paints went totally unused, so I was basically handing out candy in blood-stained fetish wear. Maybe next year…
  • One of Midget’s schoolmates had a birthday party on Saturday, so, of course, I was tapped to take her, and, of course, my social anxiety went fucking HAYWIRE. Then, as some sort of cruel joke by the Fates, Midget is the one who flipped her shit at the party because she felt nervous and shy! So then I got to be a total hypocrite and give her a pep-talk about how she shouldn’t be nervous, etc. She got over it, I didn’t. I was ridiculously out of my comfort zone – it was insane. Thankfully, the party ended up being super short, so I was able to get the fuck out of there with minimal damage.
  • I have an awesome Willow maquette from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, but there are two things that are bothering me about it right now: two of her fingers have broken off (when the fuck…?!), and she has the absolute worst fucking base of any collectible I have ever seen. You have to, like, fit her feet into the contours of the billowy bits or whatever, but it is precarious and nerve-wrecking as fuck because there's nothing that locks it in -- it all depends on the thing's own weight. I can’t even tell you how many times I have flipped my shit over the near-dropping/falling of this statue.
  • It’s fucking cold out here and I am not a cold-weather person. I want to go to the beach.
  • Jeremy and I stupidly decided to re-arrange our living room furniture on 2am Sunday morning. Once we shifted everything around, it turned out that the layout of our place (we have a great room as opposed to separate living/dining rooms) just wasn’t going to work with our furniture, number of electrical outlets, etc., so we had to move everything back. And it sucked. And I got two hours of sleep going into Munchkin’s little shindig.
  • The car needs an oil-change and the defroster is being a fickle bastard. Not looking forward to dealing with either of these things. Don’t I already have enough to do?
  • Trying to get my dad to get his ass out here for a visit next month. It probably won’t happen.

Alright then; time to get up and continue my cleaning and breaking-down of decorations. Though, honestly, I would love to say, “Fuck it,” and spend a couple of hours catching up on sleep.

Decisions, decisions…

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #50: Help me, I am in laundry hell!

Goddamnit, why can’t I ever put together a good introduction for these posts anymore?

Holding it down like a boss.

  • I am glad to report that Jeremy is doing way better than he was last week. He still sounds like shit, but he’s definitely on the upswing.
  • I have been doing laundry damn near non-stop for the last week or so. I have no idea of how this shit piles up the way it does, but it's rather disturbing.
  • Had a meeting with Midget’s teacher yesterday and she’s doing really well; that six-week hurdle I was concerned about was more like… a bread crumb in the grand scheme of things: She has all of the skills she needs to be where she is, and she’s doing well. So, put that in your pipe and smoke it, WA State.
  • I upgraded my iPhone to iOS 5 last night and spent waaay too much time making sure that everything was configured/reconfigured to my liking. When I play with gadgets, I get in the zone: understanding everything and making it absolutely perfect becomes an all-consuming mission…
  • Silver is, hands down, the most annoying character on 90210.
  • Jeremy and I played and beat Resident Evil 0 over the weekend: We had started it years ago, made it to the final save point, and then put it down because he got ├╝ber busy at work or something, and never picked it back up. I love me some RE, but, wow. I really, really disliked it; it was a completely unneeded bit of thoughtlessly crafted story that adds absolutely nothing to the narrative and actually conflicts with things that were previously established.
  • Related: sloppy writing, in general, really bothers me. A LOT.
Alright, party people, I’ve got nothing left. Munchkin is boycotting sleep once again, so I have to be on my toes at all hours – now being a prime example…

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #49: Gurgle

It’s that time again:


  • So, this post almost didn’t happen. I usually start compiling my shit a day or two in advance, but thanks to some time-management fails I am scrambling to do this so that I can keep that goddamn streak alive. A couple of more weeks, man…
  • I made Jeremy go to the doctor last week and it turned out that he had bronchitis so severe that it was bordering on turning into pneumonia. Gack! He was prescribed an opiate based cough syrup, and antibiotic, and sleep.
  • Last night, he was well enough to take me to the movies while his mom watched the girls. We saw The Thing, which wasn’t too bad. It wasn’t particularly scary, and if you’ve seen the ’82 joint then you know what you’re ultimately getting into. Also, the Thing itself made me think of vagina dentata. Constantly, because there is clearly something wrong with me.
  • We just purchased a new Xbox 360 with Kinect and set it up last night. The purchase was primarily for a bigger hard drive, but we’ve decided to surprise the girls with Kinectimals, because any time they see a telly spot for it they go ape shit.
  • I hate Blogger’s comment form and I know I’m not the only one. But do you know what else I hate? The fact that I have tried installing Disqus and Intense Debate, but both have been giving me technical difficulties. Fuckity!

Alright, my brain is too fried to really think of anything else for today. Here’s hoping I’ll be a little less brain-dead by next week…

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #48: Glow sticks and gaming -- the norm

Herpa derp derp derpity derp.

Hot mama!

  • Cold and flu season is bullshit.
  • Last week I attacked the living shit out of Resident Evil: Code Veronica X HD, as I’m sure anybody who drops in regularly probably assumed that I would. Can I just say that after all these years, two back-to-back if-you-move-even-a-millimeter-in-the-wrong-direction-instant-death-situations with no save point is still incredibly stressful even though I recalled exactly what to do/where to go? Because it is.
This is a terrible shot from the old-school release because nobody has video of this in HD. WTF, internet?! Anyway, see that giant axe? DEATH.
  • I have had an overwhelming urge to play with makeup lately.
  • Cough.
  • Glow sticks are motherfucking awesome.
  • You know what else is motherfucking awesome? DEXTER. I love that show almost as much as I love LOST. (Maybe slightly more.)
  • Scare Tactics is back on, and I have to take this moment to state the obvious: Tracy Morgan is the absolute worst host ever.
  • Hack cough.
  • My poor husband sounds way worse than I do by a long shot; I feel hella bad for him.
  • That Courtney Stodden chick disturbs the living shit out of me.
  • I need to reiterate my love for my new, comfy hat. It’s great for bad hair days.
  • I need to reiterate Midget and Munchkin’s love for my new, comfy hat, as well. They are constantly like, “CAN I WEAR IT?!”
Censored for anonymity or whatever.
Alright, ladies and gents (but mostly ladies) – I’m done for now. Also, I know that I have been pretty bad about commenting lately, but rest assured that I am reading, and that I will also try to reply over here, too. Peace~

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #47: Dexter, donuts, and hats -- Oh, my!


No witty opening sentiment today.


  • So, Dexter premiered on Sunday, and it seems to be off to a good start. I don’t know if the writers will ever top season 4, but the show still continues to be awesome. Michael C. Hall continues to be awesome playing this cat; he's totally likable... but he's a serial-killing sociopath. It's amazing. I still can't believe he got shafted at the Emmy awards AGAIN.
  • Related to Dexter: Colin Hanks is creeeepy! 
  • My sinuses are being assholes. Again. (Ew.)
  • Munchkin’s newest “thing”: telling on me when I say no to her. “Daddy, Mommy said ‘no’ to me!”
  • Women’s wrestling is fucking atrocious.
  • Digsby is making me sad because there’s some kind of issue with Facebook that is preventing it from working properly. I hope they patch it soon.
  • I bought an awesome knit hat last week: rainbow coloured, pom-pom up top, long dangly sides… and motherfucking COMFORTABLE.
  • I finally got a haircut last week, and I think that having two inches cut off made more of a difference than I initially thought it would. I still have hella hair, but the missing length is definitely noticeable. And I miss it! Gah!!
  • Midget's hair was cut last week, as well, and it's kind of weird seeing it all short. I got used to it being all long and whatnot, and I know that it will be back in no time, but, still. 
  • On the subject of Midget, she seems to be doing really well in school and it's making me all proud and shit. Insert giant smiley here.
  • 7-11 glazed donuts are fucking amazing. I mean, seriously. AMAZING. They must use unicorns and cocaine to make the damn things because I almost feel like I can't live without them.
  • Jeremy and I are starting to decorate for Halloween. It’s a big deal around here because A) it’s Munchkin’s birthday and B) it has always been our favourite holiday. We have some pretty neat decorations; I think our house is totally going to stand out this year – AGAIN, because all of our neighbors are straight-laced and lame.
  • I am ridiculously excited to get my iPhone case in the mail.

Okay, so, sinuses are in danger of exploding all over my screen. Charming, I know, but it’s the absolute truth. Time to go and curl up under the blankets and contemplate whether or not I truly need to don a nasal strip. Peace~

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #46: Scatterbrain

Fuck yeah, Tuesday!

  • I finally joined the happening folks of the world and upgraded to an iPhone yesterday. I have the white one, and I uploaded a pretty bokeh wallpaper to it, and it’s hella pretty! I love getting new gadgets and playing with them until I have everything EXACTLY the way I want it.
  • I also ordered a custom case with a Portal 2 design; it’s going to be sooooo fucking sick! I can’t wait to get it!
  • There was a crazy wind storm a few nights ago that knocked out the power in the entire neighborhood at 4:30 in the morn; it was so strong that it threatened to snap my beloved cherry tree in half. Also, the power outage obviously meant that the girls’ night lights went out, so at 5:52, Midget randomly woke up and was like, “AAAHHH!”
  • Watched Bridesmaids over the weekend; funny flick, but not as hilarious as I had been lead to believe.
  • Hung out in Seattle on Saturday: We went to the Jet City Comic Show, which was seriously lame (we only went b/c a couple of our pals were going). It was like a flea market, basically. We ended up hitting the Italian Festival, The Children’s Museum, and Orange Julius. It was good times – I’m glad we got out and saw new things.

There was also the fountain. Midget enjoyed it, Munchkin was like, "Fuck no."
  • Midget’s feet are insanely wide, which makes shoe shopping a HUGE pain in the ass. Does anyone know where I can find a good assortment of wide shoes?
  • My second cousin is in Footloose, and it’s weird.  (When I saw her in the commercial I was like, “GTFO! Really?!”) I had heard a while back that she was cast in the movie, but I figured that it was a bit-part. Apparently not? IDK. I haven’t talked to her in years, which kinda sucks b/c we got along swimmingly back in the day. Oh, well.
  • Come to think of it, I don’t talk to ANYONE much these days. I hate it when I miss people and they’re all like, “Meh.” It might be time to purge my contacts yet again.
  • Buffy Season Nine started and I still have yet to finish Season Eight. Fail on my part. Also fail? All of Jeremy and I’s comics are so disorganized that I have no idea of where anything is. Finding each issue is going to be like a goddamn scavenger hunt!

Too many scattered thoughts this week, and I’m not even in hypomanic mode, so that’s kind of scary. I need to pull my shit together, stat!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #45: A sucker punch and a shitty movie!

Insert the Rocky theme song here.

Stacy continues to hold up the fort in Keely's absence.

  • Oh, shit, you guys – the new season of 90210 has started!
  • Mayweather vs. Ortiz: surely, even the non-boxing fans have heard about this? (If not, Google and/or Buzzfeed got your back.) I really wish that the fight would have gone on longer than it did, but Ortiz seriously fucked it up. Floyd’s sucker punch was totally legal and rather deserved for that attempted head butt. If somebody tried to hit me with a dirty move like that, I’d clock the shit out of them, too.
  • Mayweather vs. Merchant (post fight): I don’t know what the hell that was about, but I heart Larry Merchant, little old drunkard that he is. I love that he stood up for himself while Floyd was talking shit to him: “If I were fifty years younger I’d kick your ass!” Awesome.
I don't have a witty caption for this.
  • I’m about to commit videogame world blasphemy here by saying that I am honestly not jazzed about Gears of War 3 dropping today. Like, at all. Give me Resident Evil 4 HD, instead.
  • Speaking of my beloved RE series, Jeremy and I finally sat down and watched Resident Evil: Afterlife on Saturday, and I can honestly say that it is one of the worst movies I have ever fucking seen in my entire life. The guy that played Wesker, by the way? Terrible actor: absolutely dreadful -- and missing the evil mastermind swagger that the former S.T.A.R.S. captain is supposed to possess.
  • Oh! And straight lifting the fight scenes from RE5 with minor changes? That’s not an homage: it’s straight lifting the fight scenes from the game b/c the fight choreographer got lazy!
  • I need the new season of Dexter in my life, like, right now. Also, why the fuck is Michael C. Hall always getting dissed by the Emmy people? The guy's acting is absolutely brilliant! 
Okay, this is threatening to get out of hand (if it hasn't already, that is). This is the part where most people put together a concise closing sentence for their entry. Of course, I'm not most people, which means that I'm just going to stop typing.

Thursday, September 15, 2011


Okay, you guys. Seriously? What the fuck is this?

Meet the newest addiction to the cast of RE: Revelations: Tits McGee Rachel.
So, let's recap: First, Capcom hate-fucks the shit out of Jill's face, and now, a pair of tits (that actually seems to lack a face) is running around in the newest Revelations trailer, screaming and running out of ammo.


Monday, September 12, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #44: I am barely functioning right now

Yo. You’re familiar with the routine, yes? Weekly flood of thoughts that don’t add up to a coherent post equals…

The one and only~

  • I was going to post about 9/11, but it was scrapped, lost to the bowels of the CTRL+A + DELETE. I don’t feel that I have the right to go on about something that didn’t affect me the way it affected others, you know?
  • I’ve been trying really hard to keep my RTT streak alive, but I feel it faltering. I’m so close to doing this every week for a year! Must… keep… going! It’s surprisingly difficult to drain a brain that doesn’t have much going on, though.
  • I think I feel the creative spark coming on, but I really don’t want to jinx it. I think my main issue is motivation: I’m perpetually exhausted, and by the end of the day I just want to sit and do nothing. Or fuck around on Twitter. Whichever.
  • I’m extremely thankful that my man can cook.
  • Midget seems to be enjoying kindergarten, which is clearly awesome.
  • So, season finale of True Blood: totally better than expected. Holy shit at the last two (?) minutes!!
  • I got my Halloween costume hella early and I’m actually feeling pretty good about it. It’s a really neat zombie cop number. I’ll take it a step further with my trusty bottle of coagulated blood… just have to try not to scare the girls too much.
  • Everyone is all up in Gears of War 3 dropping next week, but not me; I am way more stoked about Resident Evil 4 and Resident Evil: Code Veronica hitting X-Box Live in a couple of weeks.
THIS. (Redfields. ♥)
  • I have a ridiculous amount of Word docs open right now.
Okay, I need sleep. Badly. Stay classy, folks~

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #43: Allergies can suck on my nuts


(That’s not a typo.)


  • Midget is starting kindergarten tomorrow and I would be lying if I said that I wasn’t nervous as shit. There’s a meet and greet later today, so hopefully seeing the place and meeting her teacher will help put me at ease for tomorrow.
  • Also, Midget’s birthday is next week: she will be five. FIVE. Holy fucking shit!
  • The preview for the season ender of True Blood makes it look hella intense, but if it ends on a weak note (as it usually does), I will be terribly vexed.
  • Munchkin has been having issues going to sleep lately; it drives me nuts. A few nights ago she was actually awake until damn near one a.m.
  • The fact that she apparently has super-hearing does not help matters.
  • Heard a bomb-ass song called When I’m Small,” by a band called Phantogram on Subsonic’s stream about a week ago. Fucking love it.
  • Once again, thank you Subsonic for introducing me to some hella sick tunes.
  • Still having trouble getting creative. Still sick of it.

On that note, not much else to say. Good times, good times…

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #42: Why won't Munchkin sleep?!!?

If you're here,you must be totally bored; I know I am.


  • Are the East Coast readers doing alright in the wake of Irene?
  • Met up with LG and her kids when they rolled through town for their road trip Thursday; we had a blast hitting up the Pike Place Market and Woodland Park Zoo. It was so great to kick it with them, and I was hella sad to see them go.
  • I’m pretty upset that Jeff was voted out of the Big Brother house last week. I like him and Jordon; they seem like they would be fun to kick it with. It was also really sad to see Jordon flip out the way she did; she’s so adorable! Like… I just wanted to give her a big hug!
  • Goddamn, I LOVE Live105’s Subsonic! I used to listen to it all the time back in the day; I’m so happy that I can stream it via iTunes, but it’s sort of bittersweet since I usually can’t make it past the first half-hour or so. Being a grown-up with huge responsibilities (i.e. early rising children) kind of sucks sometimes.
  • Hung up some more curtains on Saturday. Exciting, I know.
  • Back to Subsonic for a second: the Halloween Ball sounds awesome. I wish they would broadcast it – I would stream that shit in a heartbeat.
  • Midget will be five in a couple of weeks, and it’s sort of mind-blowing (for me).
  • Sometimes Munchkin is so cute that I can barely stand it.
  • That is, until it is 11:12 pm and she is still awake, making the loudest noises possible and making random statements such as, "I am upstairs and you are downstairs!"
  • Okay, okay, she's still cute, but this phase bugs the shit out of me.
And on that note, I'm out.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #41: An ode to nothing in-particular

I always like to say a little something before I go into the usual brain purging, but I can’t seem to find the right words. I'm feeling a little more normal this week, though, so today's Random is (thankfully) not full of indifference or melancholy. Whee~!

Do it!

  • Jeremy and I celebrated thirteen years together over the weekend. We celebrated by watching Big Brother, and True Blood, and shouting at the kids to “GO TO SLEEP” at, like, 10:30 at night. It was awesome.
  • There were other, erm, "festivities," but that's all I'm going to say about that. Winky face.
  • I know I have said this before, but I am going to reiterate: I fucking HATE DC Universe Online. I have never played it, but I am subjected to Jeremy’s sessions constantly, and I can honestly say that I despise the damn thing. The audio is atrocious, there are camera problems galore, and it is flat-out glitched as fuck: every time Jeremy plays there’s, like, a million things that just aren’t working. How anyone can get into this game is beyond me. Move on to something worth playing, man!!!
  • Related: I love Gina Torres; she was awesome in Firefly, Serenity, and Angel (and pretty much anything she's in, really...), but her V.O. work as Wonder Woman is fucking awful. You’re better than that, Gina Torres!!
  • Had to have the brakes on my car done. I hate hate hate when I have to have any work done on that bitch whatsoever! I don’t trust mechanics, and being without my ride in a single-car household obviously does not work for anyone here.
  • They need to fucking close the set of The Dark Knight Rises. There are way too many images and videos of that shit going viral. At the rate it’s going, the whole damn movie is going to be leaked in bits and pieces on YouTube before it even hits post-production.
  • Caught Midget sleep-walking (sleep-sitting?) a few nights ago. Once again, it was creepy as fuck; she was sitting up at the edge of her bed, looking down – hair all covering her face and shit. (Sooo glad I couldn’t see those eyes!) Think Samara from The Ring.

  • Creepy, RIGHT?! (Okay, it wasn't that bad, but it was pretty close.)
  • I’ve been wanting to do something creative lately, but every time I try it just goes belly-up before I even get started.
  • Confession: I actually enjoy watching The Disney Channel’s Good Luck Charlie. I find it legitimately funny, probably because I am getting lamer and lamer in my old age.
  • LG is taking a road trip and will be here on Thursday, so I am like this:

On that note, I'm out until next week. Keep it real, or whatever~

Sunday, August 21, 2011


I was trying to come up with an awesome, poignant post about the thirteen years that I’ve spent with my husband, but, as usual, my brain swallows the shit up and I end up all, “Derp?”

So, I suppose I can get all stream-of-consciousness up in this bitch, but that’s no fun, is it? When it comes to something like this?

As previously mentioned, Jeremy and I have been together for thirteen years. THIRTEEN. That’s hella years, son! (Nine married.) During that time, we’ve seen and overcome a lot. When we started dating, everyone – EVERYONE – we knew was all, “You guys are never gonna make it.”

Clearly, we are making it. Like bosses.

I love the bloke, big teddy bear that he is. And he must love me, if he’s willing to stick around my batshit crazy ass for this long. Either that, or he is masochistic as fuck.

Regardless, love continues to be in the air for us, even after all these years. Sure, he can be a dick sometimes, and I can be quite horrible, but at the end of the day none of that matters because we are fucking making it!

So, Jeremy, if you read this, happy anniversary. LUUUUUBBBBBB~!!!

Monday, August 15, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #40: Whatever.

Another Tuesday is here, but I reckon that my Random is broken. I’ll give it a go, but only to keep my weekly posting streak alive.

Keepin' it real.

  • Pleased that the True Blood cliff-hanger I was all sad about turned around and made me un-sad. Wondering where the season is ultimately going to go; it’s been rather interesting, but what next?
  • Finally got some curtains for the living room over the weekend. Hanging them was a bitch: So much measuring, and marking, and measuring, and drilling, and marking, and measuring. At least they look nice…
  • Midget is all enrolled in Kindergarten, and I feel massively better. I even got her into the (tuition-based) all day program, so I’m extremely pleased. Now, all we have to do is get through that first six-week-probation-period hurdle.
  • “Hurdle” is a strange word.
  • I have hella hair, and it’s hella thick, and it takes hella time to manage – time that I don’t have. On the flip side, it looks better long; if I cut it, it makes my face look fat, and then I lament cutting it in the first place. Why can’t this shit ever be simple?
  • There is an insane amount of construction going on just down the road from my place. All of the surrounding woods have been demolished in favour of… more housing, I suppose? I’ve never been one to be all “ZOMG Mother Gaia, NATURE!” and shit, but I drove by a whole mess of decimated forest and felt strangely sad about it. Honestly, what I should feel sad about is the increased traffic one all of the work is done.
  • Okay, so, over the last couple of weeks, I have not been a joy to be around, and I’ve been kindasorta hiding from the world for the last few days. In fact, after I post this, I’m going right back into my shell for awhile. Do not send help.

Well, that about does it. I’ll be back in a week or so, and hopefully I’ll be shiny and brand-new.


Tuesday, August 9, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #39: Meh.

My brain is totally about to spit-up a bit. Go on and grab a burp cloth, and maybe some of those Clorox wipes: this might get messy.

Continuing to hold it down in Keely's absence.

  • Jeremy is back from Cali, which is quite nice, as taking on the kids solo is always a struggle: I would suck as a single mom. (Rephrase: I would suck even more as a single mom.)
  • I think I’m in love with Wallpaper. : I know I mentioned them before, but I’ve been getting familiar with some of their other songs. The lyrics are awesome, not because they are particularly meaningful, but because they are funny and strike a chord with the part of my brain that still thinks about the Bay Area from time to time.
  • “Hit Trader Joe's for the 2 buck chuck/20 some bottles cost 40 some dollars (bucks).”
  • I’m also in love with Rage Toons. I know they have been around for awhile, and I had read a few here and there, but I lost most of my Saturday going through tumblr and dying.

  • True Blood: I’m really upset by the ending of Sunday night’s episode. Keeping my eyes peeled during the preview for next week does not make me hopeful for an optimistic outcome. If I could insert an audio file here (and I probably could but I am too lazy to do that shit), it would be of Darth Vader screaming, “NOOOOOOO” in Episode III.
  • So, apparently, I’m known throughout the neighborhood as “the woman with the pink hair.” My MIL was here for a couple of days last week to run support and struck up a conversation with some chicks at the teeny playground down the street, which I don’t get because I dyed this shit back to brown not too long after moving in. Last year. My MIL forgot that I even had that hair color (which I cannot get for the life of me), so she was like, “Noo?” 
  • I bet those bitches are hella confused now.
  • Speaking of life in suburbia, I found out via the Facebook page (yes, there is a Facebook page) that one of the blokes somewhere hosts a fantasy football league. Seriously? Don’t I have any normal neighbors?! I hope a friendly, sassy gay couple buys the house around the corner. Because I totally need a sassy gay friend. Preferably one who can give me pointers on the proper application of eye shadow.

On that awesome note, I’m out for the week, unless I think of something rad to post in the meantime. So… peace.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #38: I meant it when I said I was going to bitch about my cancelled vacation this week

It’s Tuesday, but it's nowhere near hyphie this week.

Stacy is still awesome.
  • I should have been down in Cali, kickin’ at the beach, goddammit!!! Thanks, thing that shall remain nameless, for changing shit up and totally fucking up my shit!! 
  • On the bright side, the weather up here has actually been rather nice, so at least I’m not dying in the usual doom & gloom of the Pacific Northwest. 
I don't know who to give credit to, but this is... amazingly accurate.

  • Gizmo continues to be the stupidest fucking cat in all of existence. I get so annoyed with him that it’s not even funny (anymore). 
  • I’ve been messing with Spotify a bit. I’m not sure if I like it just yet, but it does earn some points for letting me listen to stuff that hasn't been released yet. 
  • I really wish I was kickin’ it in Cali right now.
  • I have freckles. It’s weird; I never used to have them but over the last few years they have kindasorta blown up, as they are a bit more prominent than they used to be. They are only on my nose though; I'm like Rapunzel up in here. 
  • I need to decide on a new game to play. I still haven’t finished Alan Wake, but I’d really like to go for something a little less stressful. 
  • Tried drawing again. Failed miserably. 
  • Next week I will register Midget for kindergarten and I am hella stoked about it. She made it!!!! Now we just need to make it past the six-week “probation” period and then everything will be fucking golden! 
  • On the subject of golden, LG is all booked up for a local hotel and will be here at the end of the month! I’m so glad that I’ll get to hang out with at least one familiar face from CA. Still wish I could kick it with Megan and gryffindormom but there’s nothing I can do about that now. 
  • I’m still in lawn-weeding hell. Over the weekend I pulled weeds that were as tall as my children! (No more birds have decided to hang out on my ass, though, so that's a plus...) Jeremy and I should just pay a landscaper, since we clearly don’t have the time to get to this shit before it gets completely out of hand. 

You know what? This pointless random is getting out of hand. I just don’t have much to say this week, which is kind of a good thing, I guess. Maybe it means that I’m a little more focused? IDK.

Saturday, July 30, 2011

Heart Songs -- The Sequel!

The original intent behind this post was to talk about the kids, and fear, and how I kind of envy them since I’m a total pussy when it comes to things like spiders and cartwheels, but I have some mad writer’s block, so, instead, I’m just going to share a few of the songs that I can’t stop listening to as of late.

Pulp: This is Hardcore 

I’m sure I’ve mentioned my love for this shit many times in the past. It’s still delightfully dirty, and I still love it. Honestly, though? I kind of hate the video; it takes away from the song.

Girl In a Coma: Consider

I just discovered this band recently and they are already among my favourites ever.

Wallpaper. #stupidfacedd

I talked about this a couple of weeks ago, and how I have been playing it super loud while driving through my ultra-conservative neighborhood. On a side note, Munchkin has tried singing the opening line of “That’s all you got?” but it’s in Munchkin-speak, so it comes out as, “Dat all u gaht?”

The Lonely Island: Jizz In My Pants

LOLZ for all of eternity.

Bassnectar: The 808 Track ft. Mighty High Coup

This is some good stuff to listen to when trying to be productive.

Chevelle: Letter from a Thief

These guys are underrated. I’ve said that before, too, but it’s so true.

Kota Suzuki: Sad But True

It's a good thing that I really, really like this song, because it has become one of my biggest ear worms! It has played so many times in this household that Midget and Munchkin actually recognize it: “That’s the Jill song!” My kids are going to grow up to be huge dorks…

Ellen McClain (as GLaDOS): Want You Gone (Spoiler Alert: Portal 2)

I actually woke up with this stuck in my head at three in the morning. It's awesome.

Pearl Jam: Black

Hells yes. Does anybody else feel kind of old listening to this? Or is it just me?

Ewan McGregor, Jose Feliciano, and Jacek Koman: El Tango de Roxanne

Isn't this out on Blu-Ray? If it is, somebody needs to upload a goddamn HD version of this already... Whatever. Ewan McGregor's vocals own you.

Ludacris ft. Nicki Minaj: My Chick Bad

I will always have a soft spot for Luda. The remix is sick, too.

So, yeah, that's what's been playing rabidly in my iPod, car, or notebook playlists. Good times, right? I'll try to refrain from the boring music posts for awhile, but these are such great filler material! (Plus, I'm really into my music, so it's an opportunity to kind of geek out a little bit...)

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #37: I think hyphie sounds better than crunk

It’s Tuesday, so it’s time to get all hyphie up in this bitch! Here we go~!

Still rebelling against Keely's hiatus -- like a boss!
  • SDCC. One day, I hope to go. Jeremy went for work once: He told me that it’s hella hot and smells hella bad, but I would still like to check it out. Just once.
  • At the con they revealed the character posters for The Avengers. The Hulk one looks pretty damn good. (Hulk is sort of a big deal in this household.) Still pissed that Norton was replaced with Ruffalo, though...
  • Midget made up the most awesome song a few days ago: “I was a pizza, I was a pizza, now I am a mess.” IDK what the fuck it means, but, I mean, come on. Unadulterated awesome.
  • The family trip to Cali has officially been cancelled, and I couldn’t be more disappointed. Instead of spending next week kickin’ it with friends I haven’t seen in over a year, I’ll be going through the same monotonous routine while hoping that the weather will be good enough for me to do yard work.
  • Laaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaame!!!! I'm hella sad now!!
  • We’re still planning on going down to SoCal at some point, but I really don’t know when we will have that opportunity.
  • Gordon Ramsay’s Scottish Rage.
  • Everybody is all uppity about the death of Amy Winehouse, but, really… who didn’t see it coming?
  • Ultimate Marvel vs. Capcom 3 is bullshit!!
  • I’ve still been having trouble sleeping. It’s nowhere near as bad as it was last week, but it’s enough to really wreck my shit. On top of the insomnia, the night-sweating is back with a vengeance. Ugh.
  • Kristen Stewart being cast as Snow White in the upcoming Snow White is one of the most ridiculous casting choices I have heard in a long time: That chick has the acting range of a potato. Seriously not a fan. Also, what the fuck with the suit of armor?
Vast is das?!
  • I have a disease: it’s called Zuma Blitz.
I reckon that closes out this week. Tune in next Tuesday when I mope about not being in Cali: It will be the most epic RTT installment ever!

(Not really, but whatever.)

Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Random Tuesday Thoughts #36: If Insomnia had a throat, I would stab it in the jugular

Insert engaging and witty intro somewhere over here.

Stacy, as always, is the Random Ring Leader 
  • Update: Midget got into kindergarten!! Take that, WA State, and your stupid age cut-off! This means that I get to buy school supplies; a cute little backpack, a lunchbox… So exciting!
  • I experienced single most brutal bout of insomnia I have ever had on Sunday: I slept for a grand total of one hour. One. Hour. Maybe one hour and fifteen minutes, but doubtful. Insomnia is bullshit.
  • (Goddamn, I hope I’m not going manic again...)
  • I braved the insomnia and a grand total of two hours of sleep (I got an hour nap in during the afternoon) to see Deathly Hallows Pt.2. I’m proud of myself: I held my shit together and didn’t need a single tissue during the movie. There was one scene in particular that really threatened to fuck my shit up, but IDK. Maybe I was too tired to react too much. I will say this, though: “always.”
  • I liked the book way better, though.
  • That trip to Cali that I’ve been hella stoked about? I’m starting to doubt that it will happen thanks to a pretty big wrench being thrown into things. Argh. ARGH, goddamnit!!
  • Big Brother is a show that I never thought I could get into, but it’s quite interesting. I’ve been watching for a few years now; you would think that it would get old, but somehow, it doesn’t.
  • Google +. Yay, or nay? I have yet to "experience" it yet or whatever. Should I care?
  • I treated myself to bacon and beer on Friday night. It was awesome.
I should have just scanned my sticker and made it all high-res and shit, but...
  • Caught Munchkin sleepwalking a few nights ago. Kind of creepy. Not as creepy as that one time with Midget, but still a little unsettling.

Okay, so, seriously? My brain is so fried and exhausted that I have to keep the Random short today. Hopefully nap time will come with zero complications today (like those stupid poops that either delay the start or end it early – I hate those) and I can regain some semblance of higher brain function.

Take it easy~

Sunday, July 17, 2011

The Battle of the Binky

Munchkin will be three this Halloween, which is pretty unbelievable -- something about that whole passage of time thing. Also unbelievable is her attachment to her damn binkies. It is definitely time to break her of this, especially since stumbling into her pitch black room several times a night to find the binky that she dropped during one of her somnambulistic pro-wresting sessions is killing me. (To be fair, it hasn’t been happening nearly as much lately, which I consider to be a small victory.) However, if she doesn't have all available binkies with her when it’s time to tuck her in, they have to be hunted down. She needs at least one, but will ask about the whereabouts of the others, thus delaying bedtime by however long it takes to either find them or say, “IT DOESN'T MATTER,” about fifteen times. 

So, the question is all about how to wean her off of these bastards. Midget had a binky habit, too; I had to get really creative with her: I told her that zombies came and ate those bitches. To add some realism to this claim, I took one of her binkies and attacked it with a pair of kitchen shears, making it look, well… half-eaten. Extreme, maybe, but it worked.

However, every now and then she still asks why the zombies ate her binkies…